Still Waiting..............

Yes here we are, Happy New Year...right? January 6th and still no word on travel. The twins turned 12 months old already and I haven't even met them. Monday will be two months since we received our referral and the infamous words "We need an answer quickly....". I think this is done just so the PAPs (Potential Adoptive Parents) can get emotion into an already tremendously emotional event. Then to be told "you'll be travelling a few weeks, days....and now ...who knows."
Agencies will always tell you the same thing. "we're working on it." "we're talking to Russia." but the reality is that we don't really know what is happening. PAPs are left in dark to handle their emotions and just wait.
If the wait is this long to MEET the kids, I can only imagine what step two will be like. This part is the frustration of not knowing, not being able to plan, not being able to dream or even talk about what your future might be. It's very frustrating and you feel alone and empty and almost ready to bite off the head of another person that asks "When are you getting your kids??"
It isn't anyone's fault. People care, they ask, they are genuinely concerned and they have no idea what your insides are doing.
As PAPs you feel that someone forgot you and you are left with still nothing. Its heart wrenching. Then let us not forget those who try to "fix" the situation by giving you other options; "so and so was done in 3 months....so and so got their kids from Guatemala, why don't you go there...so and so got their kids from this agency in 6 months..." AHHHHHHHHHHHHH - I know, they are just trying to help, but a small word of advice, this is not the way to help PAPs cope. Just be supportive and offer a hug, not an alternative adoption plan. PAPs that are at this stage of the game have already done months of research, planning and spending BEFORE they got to the referral stage, so changing horses mid race is NOT an option.
And so , we are in the New Year 2010, waiting for who knows how much longer.